Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Tusk

Tusk was the title track of one of Fleetwood Mac's more interesting efforts.  After the phenomenal success of Rumors, Tusk was released to great expectations, and for many it didn't live up.  For me, Tusk was good, but too long.  If you took all the weird stuff off, and released just a single album instead of the two album set, it would have been stronger.  What does this have to do with anything?  Little really, other than the fact that Fleetwood Mac used the USC marching band to record the track, and this post is going to be about another marching band, Greater Nanticoke Area.

First, a disclaimer.  I don't have the talent to play an instrument.  Humming and whistling are a challenge for me, and my family usually requests that I get out of the car once I start either.  I also lack the self confidence to perform in front of a group.  As a result, I have tremendous respect for these young men and women who choose to do both of those things every weekend.  I think it is great that a school, or football game, provides a venue for them to showcase their talents, even though it is not my particular "thing".  I am about to have some fun at their expense, but my comments are meant to be nothing more than humorous observations about their Halloween show, and should not reflect poorly on them or the members of any band, any where.  If you are easily offended, do us both a favor- click here and don't look back.

In case you missed it, Nanticoke provided the halftime entertainment at last weekend's football game.  Since it was Halloween, they spiced up their show by performing in costume, which, for me anyway, was a stroke of genius.  I thought the show was for more interesting this way, and took lots more pictures of it than I would have otherwise.  Some costumes were great, others were less so.  I was so moved that I wanted to devote some space on the blog to provide my thoughts and opinions on many of the outfits.  I'll grade each one, feel free to leave some comments below to add your ideas as well-

Pumpkin Boy- Remember when you were a kid, trick-or-treating?  At some point, your friends stopped buying the costumes in the boxes with the plastic masks and started making their own, and suddenly everyone was a bum for Halloween.  Except there was always one kid who didn't quite keep up with the trend.  He came out wearing the properly flame-retardant Aqua-man costume, along with the mask with the rubber string stapled to it.  He grew up a lot that night, and vowed to pay more attention in the future.  This costume reminds me of that.  It's well executed, but just seems a little "pre-fab" compared to the others.  I'll give it a C.
 
Bee Girl-  This is one of my favorites.This brought back memories of this video, and perhaps even better, this skit from back in the glory days of SNL.  I remember funnier bits with the bees, but that's the only one I could find online.  I lost a few minutes of my life exploring the other links on that page too.  Anyway, Bee Girl is simple, effective, brings back fond memories.  It's perhaps slightly impractical to be sleeveless this time of year, but she toughed it out for the show.  For me, this is an A.

 NYFD-  I'm not sure about this one.  It looks to me like she pulled on last night's clothes, then donned the headgear to call it a costume.  It's practical, since she can dress for the weather, but I am not sure I am sold.  I think I need something else on the bottom- the fireman's trenchcoat maybe.  As is, I have to give it a C.
 Fishnet Flapper-  I have very little to be sad about in my life, but one thing that bothers me every year at this time is a trend in costumes that started too late for my benefit.  Somewhere in the last few decades, Halloween became an excuse for girls to wear much more provocative outfits than they usually do.  This girl looks nice, mind you, there is nothing scandalous here- but fishnet stockings and a short, off-the-shoulder dress all kind of lean in that direction.  Surf around facebook for the pictures from Halloween parties to see what I mean.  Back in my day (I hate saying that), girls didn't get quite so "into the spirit".  For obvious, but non-lecherous reasons, this gets an A.
Raggedy Ann- I like this one.  It's cute and very clear as far as what she is supposed to be.  It could have been even better if they had talked one of the guys into being Raggedy Andy, but I wouldn't have done it, so I can't really fault anyone for that.  The track shoes kind of ruin it, but then again, so does the clarinet.  A nice effort, I'll give it a B.
Pirate?-  The biggest problem I have with this one is that I am not quite sure what it is.  she looks kind of pirate-y, with the puffy shirt (Seinfeld reference) and the tattered dress.  Apparently, she's keelhauled Waldo and used his famous shirt as a sash, and while I like the stockings, I am not sure they are in keeping with the costume.  I have to go with a C, just because of the uncertainty.
Army Guy-  Not much wrong with this one.  Simple, effective, weather appropriate.  If I look very carefully, I am not sure that the tops match the bottoms, but maybe that's part of camouflage that is lost on me.  I can't tell your rank, and I don't know if it is protocol, but I salute you with an A.  I may be grading these too easily, but I think there are harsher ones coming.
Poodle Skirt/Sock Hop Girl-  Outstanding.  Brings back memories of Laverne and Shirley, and in fact had me looking for the "L" sewn on the shirt.  This was an era that was actually before my time, but it this outfit looks authentic to me, without being "out of a box".  The glasses seem kind of modern, but a girl has to see after all.  Another A.
Marilyn-  I have to give this girl high marks just for trying this, but for me, it misses.   Again, this was before my time, but from what I've seen, there was a lot more to Marilyn Monroe than a dress that gets blown up by a passing subway train.  Most women on the planet can't do justice to this particular icon, so in my mind we are all better off not even trying.  Hard to grade this one, because expectations are so high- I'll give it a B, awarding extra points for the difficulty of the task.
Little Drummer Ghoul-  There is a basic problem here that has little to do with the costume.  It has to be hard to look cool when you are wearing that chest brace/drum set thing that looks more like some sort of adaptive posture corrector.  Beyond that, however, there really isn't much to the costume.  There are kids with more scary outfits hanging around the food court entrance to the mall every weekend.  This one misses- I say D.
Geisha-  I know they can't all be favorites, but wow- this one is good!  Something about her just "looks the part" in this costume- I'll guess that it's the extras besides the robe-  Her dark hair, the little sticks in her head (Ben Stiller in Meet the Parents) all add a little something that makes this convincing.  Clearly an A.
Gangster Drummer-  First the good- I am so pleased that this young man thought gangster and went to the "Al Capone Prohibition" era instead of going to the "Snoop Dog Gansta" era.  That's probably not a good reference, but I am not hip enough to know better.  Just realize that in almost all cases, gangster > gangsta.  Beyond that, however, there are some issues here.  Again, the drum set makes him look like he is on his way to adaptive PE, and the Indiana Jones hat is a little off-theme.  Give this a B.
Royal Trumpeter-  Finkernagel's rule- If you have to explain what you are, it's not an effective costume.  There's a crown, so we assume he is some sort of royalty.  The purple tunic might also lead us down that path,  but nylon sweats?  Looks like we gave up too early while creating this one.  D.
Friar Trumpet-  I wish this picture was more crisp, because I like this costume.  Again, it's the little things- he could have stopped with the robe, but add on the cross pendant and the caveman wig, and now you have it going on.  Here's a well deserved A.
Goblin Girl-  I have to be honest here- It was this outfit that got me thinking about writing this whole post.  Let's look carefully at this.  I assumed goblin, because really, who knows what a goblin looks like anyway?  This could be it- but I am pretty sure we are in violation of Finkernagel's rule with this one.  I'm confused-  Is the red sweatshirt part of the outfit, or just for warmth?  What's with the black one tied around the waist?  The best part of this, for me anyway, is not so obvious.  This girl was marching around, obviously with a place and purpose as the band performed.  She was right in between the clarinets and the drums.  Does anyone else see a problem here?  How about the fact that her only instrument seems to be her hands making that farting noise when you squeeze them together?  I'm so confused, but I'll give this a B since it provided so much inspiration.
Purple-Fringed Wicked Witch of the West-  I am guessing again on this one.  Good outfit in that she looks Halloweeny, but there is no clear message as to what she's supposed to be.  The leggings remind me of the scene in the Wizard of Oz where the witch is crushed, so I went that route.  Bottom line- I shouldn't have to work that hard to interpret a costume.  This is a C.
Joe Cool Wig Guy-  One of the best parts of this blog is that I don't have to explain myself to anyone.  I know that this is breaking the aforementioned Finkernagel's rule, but I don't care.  I like this one, I think because it actually seems to incorporate the instrument into the costume.  I also used to have a chair that was upholstered in a similar fabric to that shirt.  Whatever the reason, this is an A for me.
Queen Witch-  Here's another that I can't quite define, but I like anyway.  Black lace, red satin, bat(?) in her hair- I guess what helps here are the details- she is totally in costume.  Feeling generous, this is another A.
????-  "Mom- Did I forget to tell you that we need a costume for band today?"  Grade- Incomplete.   See me after class for some make-up work if you expect to pass.
Roller Derby Queen & Trenchcoat Guy-  Huge violations of Finkernagel's rule, and I can't find anything that redeems these costumes.  I'm giving her roller derby queen, because I just don't know where else to go with that, and trenchcoat guy isn't really a costume or character (remember Adam Sandler's "Crazy Spoon Head" bit?) but again- it seems like they have to be called something.  A pair of D's.
Mohawk Green Grass Gaiter Guy-  This one violates every rule I have- We have no clue who he's supposed to be, jeans and a dress shirt make it look incomplete, yellow mohawk and two different shades of green accessories make it look like this stuff was all he could find in the basement.  I don't care.  It's one of my favorites anyway, and it gets an A.
Italian Restaurant Tablecloth Girl-  I know that it is almost November when this was taken, so it's a little chilly.  In spite of that, some of your bandmates are out there in sleeveless dresses, bearing the cold for the sake of the performance.  With the jacket on, I can't tell what this is supposed to be- maybe the single-mom waitress costume?  Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz?  We can't grade what we can't see-  Incomplete.
Football/Rugby/Soccer Girl-  Remember the disclaimer from earlier?  Good.  Here's more.  I know and truly believe that all women are beautiful, and this girl is no exception.  Judging from the fact that she is carrying 2 instruments, I am going to say that she has even more talent than most of the performers on the field.  I would be proud to be able get to know this girl, as should any of us.  OK?  All that aside, this is not a flattering costume.  This is not her fault in any way, in fact, I am going to go off the board here for a moment and place the blame on whoever supervises this event.  Surely there is a director/moderator/parent or someone who approved all of these costumes (or else everyone would have used a sheet to become a ghost).  They should have suggested an alternative before this got all the way out to the 50 yard line.  I am giving her an A, because Mrs. FotoFink was a flautist in her day, and because I like Jethro Tull.
Flapper/Pea Coat Girl-  There's too much conflict here- The tiara and the fringe skirt all say flapper, but the pea coat says sailor.  If the coat is for the cold, then again- Can't grade what we can't see.  If it's part of the outfit, I'm lost.  Not sure where to go with this one, call it a C.
Shoulder Pad Xylophone Girl-  More confusion here, but in her defense, this is not a good angle for the picture and I didn't get a clear look at here at the game.  Still, I have no ideas as to what this is- an alien?  That spiderman villian with the bubble head?  A C is a gift here.
Finally-  I know we already saw this girl, but what is she doing now?  It looks like she has one of those pool cleaning poles- this isn't clearing up the costume at all....
Well there you have it- FotoFink's review of the halftime festivities.  There is a gallery set up with all these pictures and more on the site.  They are all right-clickable so they can be downloaded if you wish- they seemed too fun not to share.  Remember that any negative comments were directed at the costumes, not the performers, and take note that everyone passed.  In truth, the efforts of the band resulted in the most entertaining show I have seen this year, so thanks to all who participated.  Please leave some thoughts of your own here on the blog.  There's a link to click somewhere that lets you do that.  Happy Halloween!

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